Archive for Work Environment

Wouldn’t you like to know how people with high Emotional Intelligence network? Watch this brief video where I share 3 tools all emotionally intelligent people use to successfully network.


#womenandmoney #womenatwork #womenandwork #emotionalintelligence

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

Feeling pressed for time, I accidentally hit “reply all” instead of “reply” when responding to an email. As soon as my finger left the key, panic struck! I immediately began worrying about the negative ramifications of my mistake and whom I might have pissed off!

Can you relate to the feeling of dread and panic described above? Does your behavior when stressed tend to help or harm your efforts?

Given the unrelenting demands most of us experience, I’m pretty sure we’ve all wanted a “do over” from time to time. Not only has social media made such a "do over" impossible, it often allows our mistakes to live on forever in a gazillion social platforms.

If only we could stay calm under pressure!

“Keep Calm and Carry On!”

The key to staying calm under pressure is found in our brain. If we can train our brain to be our ally, instead of our foe when stressed, we will be able to stay calm under pressure.

Following are 10 effective behaviors that will train your brain to help you stay calm under pressure.

1. Be Grateful! Countless research demonstrates that people who are grateful for the positive things in their lives have lower cortisol levels – the hormone associated with stress. Researchers at the University of California, Davis demonstrated that people who felt gratitude had increased energy, positive moods and an overall healthy sense of well-being. If you begin your day feeling calm, it will be easier to stay calm when stress comes your way.

For more information on how gratitude impacts your health and your ability to handle stress, click here.

2. Think Positively. When under pressure, if you can think of a positive situation or thought, it will distract your brain from dwelling on the negativity of the stressful situation, which often feeds on itself, creating a circular doom and gloom case scenario in your brain.

Thinking positive thoughts allows your brain to keep stress in check by shifting its attention to a “stress-free” zone in our brain.

“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.” William James

3. Go off the Grid. I know, I know, it is really hard to shut off your cell phone, pull yourself away from your computer, and totally disengage from the electronic world. However, it is imperative you do just that; otherwise you are in danger of frying your brain and burning out. If feeling overwhelmed is your emotional baseline, stressful situations are bound to put you over the edge.

Being constantly “on” does not give your brain the opportunity to rest, de-stress and re-charge, making manageable irritations feel unmanageable.

If you’re reading this blog I’m pretty sure our national security is not riding on your availability. Therefore, train yourself and let others know (in an appropriate way) that you are “off the grid” for specific periods of time such as evenings or weekends.

4. Get Sleep. When we are sleep deprived normal stressors are blown out of proportion, often feeling insurmountable. Following a good night’s sleep, that same stressor experienced when sleep deprived doesn’t feel like such a big deal.

Take a page from the old milk commercial: “sleep does a body good!” Click here to read the scientific proof behind this statement.

5. Be Active. Physical activity keeps your body and mind healthy. You don’t have to train for a triathlon to gain all the wonderful benefits physical activity has on your health and overall well being. Simple activities such as walking and climbing stairs get the job done.

Physical activity stimulates the vagus nerve (a part of the autonomic nervous system) that calms the body down, which is necessary for staying calm when under pressure.

6. Practice Meditation. Studies show meditation helps with stress, blood pressure and staying calm in stressful situations. Meditation activates alpha brainwaves that relax you, allowing you to mentally distract yourself from things that are bothering you. Click here to read more on how mediation helps you stay calm when stressed.

7. Don’t Play the Victim. When things don’t go according to plan, professionally and personally, avoid the “whoa is me” thinking. Playing the victim only adds stress to what is an already stressful situation.

Remember – we cannot control all the stressors that appear in our lives, but we can control how we respond to them.

8. Eat Healthy. A few years ago my son introduced me to a book titled: “It Starts With Food” – and the title says it all. Food provides the fuel and foundation for a healthy brain. A healthy brain is key to staying calm when under duress.

9. Breathe Fully. Breathing provides oxygen to the brain. IF the brain is not appropriately oxygenated, it is impossible to stay calm under pressure.

The appropriate way to breathe is to inhale deeply filling up your chest and stomach with air, then exhaling slowly and deliberately. Click here to read more on how to breathe stress out of your body.

10. Keep it All in Perspective. Two questions I’ve asked my clients and kids over the years when things go wrong: “What is the worst thing that can happen now?” and “Will this make any difference in two years?”

Chances are the answer to these questions will not incur loss of life. Anything less than that must be kept in perspective. Sure, your boss might yell at you, you might lose a big account, your spouse might be really pissed off, but nobody is going to die.

Incorporating the above behaviors into your life will result in having a trained brain that will help you stay calm when under pressure.

#womenandmoney #womenandwork #womenatwork #femalefinancialfitness

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

Secret to a Successful Salary NegotiationAre you sick and tired of being underpaid? Read today’s newsletter where I share the ONLY secret you need to know for a successful salary negotiation.

Money does indeed make the world go round!

Let’s be completely honest – we are all working to make money.

(Some women appear to have a more difficult time embracing this concept than men, but that is a story for another day.)

Sure, many people work because they truly want to make a difference and to make the world a better place – and this is quite admirable.

But it’s hard to help others if we are continually stressed out about money –

worried about paying our bills

worried about having enough money to put our kids through college

worried about acquiring the financial security needed to retire.

Negotiation Secret

You’ve been frustrated in your futile attempts to secure a real pay raise for years.

You did your research and you know your worth.

You’ve consistently demonstrated your value and connected the dots between what you do and how it correlates to increased revenue for your company.

You’ve met with the decision-maker(s) and yet, time and time again you’ve walked away either empty-handed or with the ridiculous party line: “no one is getting a pay raise this year” blah blah blah.

Before your next salary negotiation meeting, begin to strategize for your raise -now -by asking the powers that be this ONE question:

“What are you doing now that you can’t stand doing – and that I can do for you?”

Can you imagine the shock and pleasantly surprised reaction that spreads upon your boss’ face as they begin to realize they can unload all the work they hate doing – freeing them up to do more of the work they enjoy.

Final Thought

Asking this one question consistently – and performing the given work earnestly – will set you up for a positive salary negotiation.

AND whom do you think your boss will think of when the next promotion comes along?

By laying the foundation for your salary negotiation to be about your company –and not about you – will set you up for a successful salary negotiation.

#womenandmoney #womenandwork #womenatwork #femalefinancialfitness #communicationexpert

~ as published in The Huffington Post

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

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4 Communication Mistakes It’s pretty safe to say everyone agrees that effective communication skills are a vital “soft” skill for success yes?

But many people are totally unaware of every day communication mistakes that go unchecked.

These mistakes not only get in the way of your success – but they also piss people off – damaging important work relationships.

Following are 4 common communication mistakes that piss people off – and how to stop them.

4 Communication Mistakes that Piss People Off

1. Constantly interrupting when others are speaking.

We all know who these people are and they really piss us off.

Interruptions can take many forms. The most common is the question that just can’t wait until we are finished speaking our thought and/or presentation. The interrupter needs to have their question answered now!

People who constantly interrupt others exhibit poor listening skills and are usually not interested in what you are saying.

Interrupters have to say what they need to say the moment a thought or comment or question pops into their head.

No filter.

Quite frankly, they don’t really care to listen to what you have to say – after all, it’s really all about them.

If you want to damage your work relationship – make it a point to interrupt every chance you get. People will surely be pissed off at you.

Solution: Make a conscious effort to pause and breathe deeply before opening your mouth to speak. This takes practice but it is a skill that can be learned.

2. The Space Invader invades our personal space by standing way too close to us during a conversation.

This invasion of our personal space leaves us feeling uncomfortable and a little anxious at times.

Why? Space invaders upset our human desire to avoid “getting so close to other people.” For a more detailed discussion of personal space go to: http://bit.ly/personal-spaces

The appropriate speaking distance between two people, although it varies according to culture and level of intimacy, is between four (4) ft. and twelve (12) ft.

Solution: Simply know what 4-12 ft. looks like and put it into play.

3. Constantly breaking eye contact during a conversation. If you want to send someone the message they do not have your full attention –let your eyes frequently wander away from them while they are speaking.

Glancing at our phone, checking our watch –doing all sorts of other seemingly benign behavior– sends the message that you are distracted.

Or, perhaps even worse, that you have something better to do with your time than listen to them.

Conversely, unrelentingly staring at someone while they are speaking can be intimidating – and downright creepy.

You know the stare – we all do. It can leave us feeling intimidated. And no one likes it one bit.

Solution: Maintain appropriate genuine eye contact throughout the conversation. You do not want to be constantly looking away from the speaker – nor do you want to appear obsessively “locked in”. Either behavior will piss people off.

4. Poor Body Language

Over fifty (50%) of all communication takes place non-verbally. More specifically, our body language screams messages without uttering one word!

Poor posture, fidgeting, flailing arms and anything else that might distract the listener will inhibit your ability to get your message across.

Besides being distracting, it can be annoying and irritating – and yes, you guessed it, piss people off.

If you want to communicate your message with confidence, competence and poise – you must look confident, competent and poised.

Solution: Practice speaking in front of a mirror or video yourself speaking and then watch the video with the volume turned off. This will give you great insight into what message your body language is sending. Or perhaps ask someone you trust to evaluate your body language while speaking.

Practice, practice, and practice some more.

Some people are naturally effective communicators, most of us are not.

Remember – the goal of communication is to connect with others, ditch any behavior that advances this goal.

#communicationexpert #womenandmoney #womenatwork #womenandwork

~ as published in The Huffington Post

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

Wouldn’t it boost your career if you could learn to effectively communicate? Watch my video blog where I share 3 simple tips on how to become a more effective communicator.



#womenandmoney #womenandwork #womenatwork

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

Remember the rising star in your company whom everyone “just knew” was going to rocket to stardom?

Yet his career never seemed to take off.

It’s not that he wasn’t smart. He was.

It’s not that he didn’t work hard. He did.

It’s not that he wasn’t well liked. He was.

Yet, in the wake of a stellar lift off, his career seemed to stall after being launched.

What exactly happened?

This rising star allowed his success to reach its expiration date!

Yes, everyone’s (current) success has an expiration date attached to it.

In the book written by Spencer Johnson titled: “Who Moved My Cheese?” Johnson discusses how to successfully deal with the inevitable changes we face in both our personal and professional lives.

And if one thing in life is certain, besides death and taxes, it’s change.

The rising star whose success expired failed to successfully navigate professional change.

He failed to remain relevant.

What was cutting edge technology today may well be irrelevant tomorrow.

What was known to be a “sure thing” today, is factually proven wrong tomorrow.

Forecasted trends prove worthless in a global economy whose rapid pace of change is staggering.

Following are some valuable ways to help you stay relevant – so your success does not reach its expiration date:

1. Adapt to the changing landscape. The only thing constant is change. Rather than waste your time and energy fighting change, learn to adapt to it. Otherwise, you and your skill-set will become obsolete.

2. Be Flexible. The Japanese observe how, during a heavy snowfall, the resilient bamboo bends but the unyielding oak breaks. As the winds of change blow in your company and your field, rather than strongly resisting it – be flexible and embrace it.

3. Be Pro-active. Seek out the upcoming trends and educate yourself about them. Staying ahead of the curve will keep you relevant.

4. Observe and Listen. Observe the trends and listen to its experts. Then perform your own due diligence.

5. Read. Reading is arguably the best way to stay on top of your game. Reading will let you know what is “in” and “out” in your industry, and where things may be headed. Reading will keep you informed and ahead of the curve.

The information, knowledge and expertise that made you successful today, may be totally irrelevant for tomorrow’s success. It is your responsibility to stay relevant so your success does not reach an expiration date.

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox
www.linkedin.com/in/drpattyanntublin
 

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UCONN HUSKIES Women’s Basketball Team Success Secrets Wouldn’t you love to lead in business the way the UCONN Huskie women’s basketball team leads on the court?

You don’t have to be a basketball fan to love March Madness!

One of the many reasons I love sports is because they are such a great analogy for life. You win some, you lose some and you don’t always get the call(s)!

For example, Saturday night my beloved Wisconsin Badgers men’s team lost to the Florida Gators in an exhilarating buzzer beater (#On Wisconsin).

While on Tuesday evening my state’s team – the women’s reigning basketball champion UCONN HUSKIES continued their domination with another not-even-close victory over Oregon.

You win some, you lose some!

Of course nothing in sports (or life) is a sure slam dunk, but it looks as if Geno Auriemma’s HUSKIES are well on their way to winning their 5th consecutive national championship.

The word unprecedented is often overused; however, the UCONN Women Huskies basketball program continues to achieve unprecedented greatness with the most consecutive NCAA wins – 111 and counting, most consecutive national championships – 4 on the way to 5 – and the list of achievements goes on and on.

UCONN Huskies Secret to Success

You know you have transcended your sport when not only other coaches, but also leaders in every industry are in awe of what a program has accomplished. And they seek to emulate it.

Coaches and players from all sports and geographical locations pilgrimage to Storrs, CT, home of the Huskies, in search of this powerhouse programs’ winning formula.

Here is what they have discovered.

Drumroll please.

First and foremost.

There is NO secret success formula! There is NO unique coaching skill set that Geno or his legendary assistant Chris Daly transmits to the Huskies that result in their greatness.

Rather, the UCONN Huskies success is based upon a tried and true formula operationalized throughout the ages – in sports, business and life. The formula is not hidden in Geno’s playbook or any other book.

What makes this program so successful?

High expectations, an unrelenting attention to detail rooted in the fundamentals along with an uncompromising work ethic based on persistence and consistency. These are the Huskies guiding principles that Geno and his staff utilize to catapult the UCONN Huskies to greatness, year after year after year.

If you want to achieve success in your career and/or your life, allow these three principles to guide your actions.

3 Principles for Success

1. High EXPECTATIONS. Expect to do your best – and give your all – 100% of the time. Not only when you feel like it, but perhaps more importantly, when you don’t feel like it.

For the Huskies, nothing less than their absolute best is acceptable – not just during game day – but during every practice, during every single drill, during every single moment they set foot on the court.

High expectations define the UCONN Huskies mindset – anything less is unacceptable.

Parents, you should take note of these principles and consider them to be your “best practices” for parenting. Your kid’s teachers, coaches, peers and community will thank you! And you might actually be able to stop financially supporting your kids once they enter adulthood – which begins, more of less at 21 years old, not 30 years old.

But I digress.

2. Unrelenting attention to detail rooted in the fundamentals of the game.

IF you want to learn or teach anyone the fundamentals of basketball, watch the Huskies at play. Every single time the HUSKIES are on the court, they put on a passing, shooting and running clinic – with an emphasis on doing it the right way.

You will also notice there is very little, if any showboating from this team.

The fundamentals of basketball are rooted in a team effort – it is truly about “we” and not about “me”.

Countless times you’ve watched Geno upset after the HUSKIES scored a basket or earned another “W”? Why? Because the results were secondary to the way the Huskies played. If they played sloppy or ignored the fundamentals – the basket or win was irrelevant. The emphasis is on the game being played correctly.

Geno states: “It’s about doing it in a way that it can’t be done any better. That is the goal every day.”

Which leads me to the Huskies third guiding principle for success.

3. Work Ethic comprised of persistence & consistency.

Practice doesn’t make perfect.

Perfect practice makes perfect.

In “So Good They Can’t Ignore You,” author Cal Newport states that incredible success comes from expert practicing. “… they can push themselves to the exact limit of their skillset and thus expand their abilities day after day. If you’re not expanding yourself in such a fashion – called deliberate practice – in the org psych lit – you’ll never be ridiculously successful.”

This concept goes beyond Malcolm Gladwell’s belief that ten thousand hours is the magic number needed to achieve greatness. Is it not just about the time put in, rather it is about the way the time is put in.

Perfect practice makes perfect – as Geno’s above quote emphasized!

Watching the UCONN Huskies play basketball is like watching poetry in motion.

When this happens, we are tempted to think the team and its program are comprised of superhuman geniuses. They aren’t. The Huskies are just like you and me.

With one exception.

It is this one exception that differentiates good teams from great teams, good companies from great companies, and good leader from great leaders.

And this exception is the norm for the UConn Huskies Women’s basketball program: high expectations, an unrelenting attention to details and an incomparable work ethic.

Anything less is unacceptable.

Oh – and one more thing #playlikeagirl.

#womenandmoney #womenatwork #womenandwork

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

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Click video image above to watch this brief video where you will learn 4 powerful, easy & highly effective tools to decrease stress out of your life – both at work and at home!
#womenandmoney #womenandwork #womenatwork

~ as published in The Huffington Post

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

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Mar
01

Do You Have the “It” Factor?

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Do you have the "it" factor?Wouldn’t you love to be that guy or gal that everyone wants to be around?

The person who commands a “presence” when they walk into a room.

The person who exhibits magnetism that makes others naturally gravitate towards them.

Everyone wants to be on his or her team.

Everyone wants to work with them – or for them.

Question: So what exactly is “it” that these people possess?

Answer: Executive Presence

What is Executive Presence?

Sylvia Ann Hewlett states that Executive Presence is seen in the way you act, look and sound.

People with executive presence exhibit confidence, competence, poise, effective communication skills and the ability to remain calm in the eye of the storm -all fundamental characteristics of executive presence.

If you don’t look, act and sound like an executive or leader, it will be extremely difficult to be perceived as one or to become one.

Here’s the really good news. Executive Presence can be learned.

3 Key Ingredients Essential to Executive Presence

1. Gravitas – how you act or behave is perhaps the single most important component of Executive Presence.

Read More
#executivepresence #womenandmoney #womenatwork #womenandwork

~ as published in The Huffington Post

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

holiday-office-party-sml Remember the guy from last year’s holiday party that got so drunk he threw up all over himself – and everyone around him?

Or the gal who showed up so scantily dressed you did a double take (for all the wrong reasons) when she walked in the room?

Of course you do! And so does everyone else.

Holiday Office Parties are Back!

Once thought gone for good, the office holiday party is back!

And make no mistake about it; these parties are not really parties. They are business events masquerading as parties.

We’ve all heard and/or seen people commit career suicide due to their inappropriate behavior at these events.

Sure, these parties are a chance to hang out with business colleagues, usually in a fun and informal setting.

Do not be lured into the false pretense that you are hanging out with your friends – no matter how good the music, the booze or the food.

Do’s and Don’ts for the Office Holiday Party

Below is a list of do’s and don’ts for your company’s holiday party to avoid politically shooting yourself in the foot while spreading good cheer!

1. GO! Don’t even think about blowing this party off.

Love em or hate em, it will serve you well to be seen at them.

#womenandmoney #womenatwork #womenandwork

~ as published in the Huffington Post

The Place For Relationship Tools For Success In Business and Life,

Dr. Patty Ann
www.relationshiptoolbox.com
www.relationshiptoolbox.com/blog
www.twitter.com/drpattyann
www.facebook.com/relationshiptoolbox

 

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